Is There a Magic Pill in Divorce?

There are no quick fixes in divorce, but there is one magic path and it stems from the inside out when you learn how to lean into it

—

Who could blame someone for looking for a magic pill to make the pain stop?

There’s no denying that divorce is messy, complicated and stirs just about every emotional pot there is to stir — but it’s temporary and you will get to the other side.

The big question is, what condition will you (and your kids) be in when you get there? And how much of yourself are you willing to sacrifice in the process? Let that sink in for a minute. Even when you are at your most powerless, you can begin to call your power back when you get clear about your goals, objectives and how you want to show up.

You’re not expected to know how to do this.

You’ve likely never stared down divorce, and all of its complications, before — and you are likely feeling very overwhelmed and pulled in many directions just trying to absorb the magnitude of it all and keep your head above water. I get it. In fact, I once stood exactly where you are.

Take a deep breath.

A client recently reflected words back to me that I had said to her in a session, “there is wisdom and grace in moving at your own pace.”

The house may feel like it is on fire in divorce. While there may be pressing issues that require immediate attention, the truth is that in most circumstances you can take a step back, consciously set the tone and pace according to your needs and desires. However, that takes clarity.

But no one can just make your problems go away — not a mediator, not a lawyer, not an investment advisor and not even a coach. Important as they are, they are merely pieces of your divorce puzzle that you get to assemble. I totally understand that when we are in pain — we just want the pain to stop.

Hey, you can’t blame anyone for trying!

This is precisely why I love this work. Sure, it’s about helping clients get through the divorce...and that’s huge. I’ll let you in on a little secret: It’s actually much bigger than that.

When women lean into themselves — when they return to their own superpowers, uncover parts of themselves that got buried away, remember who they are and what they truly desire — great healing occurs.

This isn’t about Band-Aids, magic pills or quick fixes. This is about sustainable life skills that will change how you interact in the world forever. It’s about pulling the roots from the garden so that the same patterns, belief systems and wounds that got you here, aren’t repeated in the future.

The women in our program that show up for themselves and each other in our classes and one-on-one sessions literally begin to transform before our eyes. I’m not going to diminish the pain and condition that they are usually in when they arrive, but this work allows them to exhale, soften, release, reclaim and trust themselves again.

And I’ve got to tell you...there is nothing more magical than that. We can learn to use the events of our lives.

—Kristen Noel, Certified Intuitive Divorce Coach | Editor-In-Chief, Best Self Magazine