Coming Alive Again

Anger, resentment, fear...they’re all ‘normal’ emotions in divorce — but so is coming alive again

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Sometimes a selfie is worth a thousand words...well, at least it is when your client texts you a picture of herself with the caption, “I’m in a full-blown love affair.” Swoon.

Who doesn’t like a love story...especially after a long, protracted, divorce that played out like a Lifetime movie with twists, turns, court scenes and all? There was a time when this smitten client was seething and full of rage. In fact, I even began to wonder if it would ever subside...

But you know what? She is living proof that showing up for yourself, your emotional healing, your kids and yes, your divorce — shifts the trajectory of everything.

Just as divorce can take everything down, healing can lift it all back up.

Week after week, she attended our group classes and one-on-one coaching calls. Sometimes she cried, sometimes she spewed angry sentiments, sometimes she rallied for others in the group and sometimes she even laughed at herself. Most of all, she healed in front of our very eyes. Her face softened and transformation was underfoot.

This successful, self-made woman wasn’t giving up even though she was distraught and defeated. Though somewhat skeptical if things would ever get better, she committed to get this right. She plowed on and life began to shift...and she came to life again. Suddenly, she began to return to herself and all that made her feel alive.

Beneath all anger is a wound that is crying out to be healed. And just as the DNA of no two people is the same, neither is the healing journey.

One thing is for sure, when you’re in the thick of divorce, you can’t see your way out. It can be overwhelming and the horizon is too far off in the distance to imagine what the future could bring. This is precisely why learning skills to navigate the upheaval and pain, to nurture and support yourself through it all — is a gamechanger.

Perhaps you dream of a true love story, or maybe you aren’t interested in another relationship at all. Either way, I bet when you sit in stillness and close your eyes, your heart speaks to you and whispers, it’s OK to come alive again, to dream, to be heard, to smile and be happy and live happily ever after.

Allow yourself to fall in love with life again...and see where it leads you.

—Kristen Noel, Certified Intuitive Divorce Coach | Editor-In-Chief, Best Self Magazine