Are You Worth Investing In?

The stakes are high. Your self-worth may feel low. This is the time to invest in you, your kids and your future.

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Trigger alert.

Look, I’m not going to sugarcoat the enormity of what it means to get divorced. There are some undeniable and harsh realities to the divorce process.

Whether you initiated it or not, it will dig up emotions, heartache, anger and sadness.

It will invoke feelings of vulnerability, uncertainty, self-doubt and at times even make you want to hide beneath the covers.

It will have you worried about your kids and how they will fare through it all.

It will have you concerned about the future and finances and where this is all headed.

It will have you confused about which move to make first, which check to write first, whose advice to follow first.

It will have you questioning who you are within it all and where will you be when the dust settles.

It’s a lot all at once. But that doesn’t mean you should stop taking action. It means you should be prepared the best you can.

Maybe in a perfect world you wouldn’t be getting a divorce...or have gotten into an unhealthy marriage in the first place?

But here we are. The past is the past, so let’s deal with this present moment and how you can best support yourself through this so that you can get the best outcomes.

You’re not expected to have all the answers and know all the factors involved, but this isn’t a time to wing it and figure it out as you go. It’s actually a time to get strategic and heart-centered and intuitive.

How do you do it? You reach for help.

Why now? Because it will significantly mitigate the damage.

We talk to overwhelmed mommas every day. We get it — and it’s painful to witness as they recount their circumstances, because we know what they are in for — and we want to be able to help them all. I literally want to wrap my momma arms around each and every aching momma heart, but sadly, even my arms aren’t that long.

It’s hard not to know what you don’t know.

It’s hard to trust others in a time of betrayal.

It’s hard to invest more money with so much uncertainty.

It’s hard to believe that this will ever get better...but it will.

You will get to the other side of your divorce eventually...the question is, in what condition? That is something within your power.

So, why not get out in front of it?

It starts with recognizing that you are worthy of support. You are worthy of investing in — and a healthy, happy, peaceful future for you and your kids is priceless.

Overwhelm is not your friend. It will tell you...just handle this part first and you can deal with the rest later. What’s later? Dealing with your kid’s emotions, knowing how to help them navigate their feelings (and your own)? Everything unaddressed and shoved to the side will still be waiting for you when you get there...and at risk of being far worse.

Yes, your attorney will get the legal process going, but what about the emotional one that takes place in all the in-between moments — at home with your kids, in the middle of the night when you are stressing? They can’t help you there.

This is when you need an expert divorce coach.

This is the time to be kind to yourself. Be gentle, forgiving and compassionate — not chastising and judgmental. It is the time to allow yourself to be supported instead of suffering in silence. Investing in yourself now will dramatically shift your experience and outcomes.

Aren’t you and your kids worthy of that?

Are you ready to invest in yourself and reclaim your worthiness? I hope so.

—Kristen Noel, Certified Intuitive Divorce Coach | Editor-In-Chief, Best Self Magazine